Midnight post…Dear Diary?

As my internet gateway flickers like lights on a Christmas tree, I open word pad, because I will not be denied an opportunity to write. My wolf hybrid is off in the back of the yard barking at some unseen menace. My bluefront amazon is behind me making silly little soft noises. My youngest daughter comes barging in announcing to me she can’t find her boyfriend. Well, he is around here somewhere, it’s a big house and almost four acres outside. Hmm, maybe that is why Luma is barking. Maybe he went outside to smoke.

I am forty-five years old going on 46. I am old enough to do whatever I want and still young enough to enjoy it. Yet, I waste countless hours here in front of my laptop. Spend hours scrolling through wordpress. I have become addicted to likes and comments on my blog. It’s nothing grand I lnow, it’s just a way to let people get to know me. Well if they do more than just scroll through the reader liking everything without clicking on the link and actually coming to my blog for a few minutes. Again I say this is me. This blog is me. You can know me better from my blog than spending days hanging out with me. Just like my posts, sometimes I am boring, sometimes, excited, funny, depressed and ocassionally I strike a nerve with what I reveal.

I so want to express what goes on in my head. I have all these great words that come together to form interesting things for a blog post. I can go over it in my mind but when I try to produce it on the keyboard my train of thought tends to get derailed. I am not trying to sell anything or tell anyone how they should live their lives. There’s enough of that kind of thing everywhere you look or go. Within the next couple of weeks I am going ad free. I don’t do google adsense or anything like that and I don’t want ads appearing on my blog. Especially not anything I have no control over. This is my little hiding place. This is my diary, scrapbook, my sounding post, my place to express myself.
Now all is quiet except for the Dollar General store clock on the wall ticking. Yes, it wants to be heard too. Any minute now I will hear a train coming through, since I am only a half a mile from the train tracks, in sort of a rural setting. Then my pitbull will start to bark, challenging the strange bellowing beast just out of site. It’s nearing midnight and I should be in bed, but no not yet. Got to wait on the dsl signal to be steady again and make this rambling post and check my stats. I am hoping for 100 likes today, but I will probably fall short of that. I only had 86 last I checked. Blasted dsl just wants to keep me in suspense. Looks like it is straightening out. Come on I only need a few minutes to post and check stats.

Well, darn it!  I only got 93 likes.  Well, that’s still the best so far for one day.  Now to start all over again seeking 100 likes in a single day.  Oh how I have become enslaved by the internet and my own vanity.


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